on comfort

When I was growing up and learned about idol worship, I envisioned gold calves. As I became older, I learned that an idol is anything placed before God: money, fame, etc. I think a lot of us brush off the whole idol-worshiping problem as one that isn't our own. For example, I haven't been burdened with the temptation of placing fame over God.

But then I had a revelation. Here is the passage:

 "Yes, they knew God, but they wouldn't worship him as God or even give thanks. And they began to think up foolish ideas of what God was like. As a result, their minds became dark and confused. Claiming to be wise, they instead became utter fools. And instead of worshiping the glorious, ever-living God, they worshiped idols..." - Romans 1:21-23

Here is the corresponding footnote in my study Bible. I answered the questions on paper, and I encourage you to as well:

How could intelligent people turn to idolatry? Idolatry begins when people reject what they know about God. Instead of looking to him as the creator and sustainer of life, they see themselves as the center of the universe. They soon invent "gods" that are convenient projections of their own selfish ideas. These gods may be wooden figures, or they may also be goals or things we pursue, such as money, power, or possessions. They may even be misrepresentations of God himself--making God in our image, instead of the reverse. The common denominator is this: Idolaters worship the things God made rather than God himself. Is there anything you feel you can't live without? Is there any priority greater than God? Do you have a dream you would sacrificed everything to realize? Does God take first place in your life? Do you worship God or idols of your own making?

After looking at my answers, I realized that they all had one thing in common: my personal comfort. And it struck me: an area I struggle with is personal comfort. I love being comfortable. I seek it out in almost every area of my life and I treasure the feeling of being secure and... comfortable. Who doesn't? I enjoy snuggling up in a pile of blankets, feeling emotionally safe in loving friendships and relationships, perfect weather (today I have been so blessed with weather in the 80s!!), comfort food, smells like lavender that make me feel cozy, the reassurance I feel after reading about God's love, music that makes me feel warm and calm inside, ordering food I am familiar with when I go out to eat... And I think in America, it is particularly hard to not have idols.

I don't think God is asking me to give up everything I enjoy. On the contrary, I realize that these are gifts--everything good is a gift from God (James 1:17). However, answering the questions from the study Bible and reflecting about the implications of those answers helped me to identify that comfort is a potential area for disobedience in my life: disobedience that could result when I value the security I find in comfort OVER the things God is trying to do through me.

Something my pastor says is that "God is more concerned with your character than your comfort." Yes, yes he is. And you give God the opportunity to move in your life when you take a step outside of the comfort bubble. God works through our weaknesses (2 Corinthians 12:9).

This revelation is one of the ways I felt that the Holy Spirit was preparing me for my current journey. And now I'm just 25 days away from being in Herrnhut, Germany!

i was accepted!

I was accepted into the Youth With A Mission (YWAM) Justice Discipleship Training School (DTS)! I am so excited. Praise the Lord!

Just in case you don't know too much about the YWAM program, I'll provide a brief explanation of the program in general as well as a description of my particular DTS. YWAM's purpose is to know God and to make him known. If you'd like to know more about YWAM, you can learn all about it here. The DTS that I am a part of will have the general DTS curriculum, PLUS it will focus on the issue of human trafficking. I cannot wait to spend three months at the base in Germany for the lecture phase: training, growing in faith and learning. I also can't wait for the outreach that will follow for three months after the lecture phase. The country for outreach is to be determined, so stay tuned to find out!

The YWAM base in Herrnhut, Germany started their Justice DTS a year ago. If you would like to meet one of the women who began it, check out this video.

As I'm preparing, I would really appreciate your support. The most powerful support that you can offer is prayer. Will you please pray that the Lord will bless this preparation time, as well as the school itself? Thank you so much!

a beautiful adventure

Sitting in my old room in my parents' home in a suburb of Indianapolis, I have a blank blog, hope, and a big white board for planning. I moved back home this past weekend, the first big step of faith on my journey into the next chapter of my life.

I'm looking to glorify God in all the areas of my life. Lately I've been particularly attentive to how I ought to spend my time, and on a larger scale, how I am to use the gift of life that has been given to me. Two books about purpose have been encouraging me on the topic of purpose: Rick Warren's The Purpose Driven Life and Richard N. Bolles' How to Find Your Mission in Life.

Human trafficking has been heavy on my heart for a few years, and I have been praying since March- God, if it is your will for me to serve you in the area of human trafficking, will you please show me what that might look like? 

About two weeks ago, He spoke to my heart, and the Holy Spirit offered the calm assurance that this, this, is the right step and an incredible opportunity to be obedient. I feel a physical calm in my heart, which is unlike anything I've felt with a decision I've made in the past. I feel called to participate in the Justice Discipleship Training School (DTS) at the Youth With A Mission (YWAM) in Herrnhut, Germany. This particular DTS focuses on human trafficking. It begins on August 25, 2012. I am so incredibly excited.

The journey so far has been a series of blessings.

• Two days after I felt moved to do this, my pastor gave a message called The Showdown. He said that whenever God asks you to step out, He will provide supernatural protection and supernatural provision. It was encouraging and comforting, and so fitting for the state my heart is in. My God always provides.
• I had been living with my sweet friend Emily, and our lease was set to be renewed a little over a week after I felt the conviction I shared above. It just so happened that another close friend, Kelsey, has been looking for a place to live and a roommate. Kelsey moved in with Emily the day I moved out. There is no way that the timing of my lease ending and needs being met is a coincidence. My God works in such awesome ways.

I am waiting to hear back about my application. If this is the direction that God has for me, I pray that the application will go through. If not, I'm praying for a closed door. Your prayers for God's will in my application would be much appreciated!